No doubt about it. The weather outside is frightful. The National Weather Service is calling for a windchill of -52 in Polebridge,  so we’re all hoping that the wind won’t blow. Then it’s only -30.

Still, that’s muscle-cramping, teeth-chattering, car-don’t-start cold. The kind of cold that makes your eyes water, your nose hairs freeze, and your cheeks burn like sparklers. Raw, slicing, bitter cold.

In conditions like this, I begin to wonder just exactly how much colder it is outside than, say, a witch’s outermost bust area, a well-digger’s gluteus maximus, or perhaps a brass toilet seat on the shady side of an iceberg. What about a gold digger’s heart or Jack Frost’s toes or  Santa’s belt buckle? Hmm. One wonders.

But since it’s too cold to type or think (obviously), let’s look at pictures. And, if you have any go-to expressions that you like to use in weather like this, let us know in a  comment below. We’re running out of good ones.

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15 thoughts on “Baby, It’s Cold Outside!”

  1. Oh BRRRR. That sounds just really very cold. And here I am complaining because it fell below freezing and I had to drag all the plants into the garage! (Well, for multiple nights, and there are a lot of plants.) But now I see that is nothing. Hope you both manage to stay warm!! Monica, why aren’t you wearing a balaclava in the pictures? Protect those rosy cheeks.

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  2. To your credit, lugging plants back and forth isn’t any fun. As for a balaclava, you’ll be happy to know I wear one to bed, along with long underwear. I look like a cat burglar.

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  3. Wow!!!! I’ve knew it was cold in the Valley but………baby it’s cold outside. Your yurt looks cozy and warm with your beautiful tree and the photos are extraordinary. Layer, layer, layer and just think of the Islands. Happy holidays to you both. Dare I say it’s HOT down here. 96 degrees ,but I better not complain. Love, P

    Sent from my iPad

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  4. When I was a youngster, my best friend’s grandpa was always our source for humorous expressions. Most were rated at least PG! His favorite cold weather expression was that it was “cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey!” Sounds like its cold enough up in Polebridge to shatter them when they hit the floor!

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      1. I await the results of your test with much anticipation! I always wondered myself if it could really ever get cold enough to freeze brass – then I would remember Grandpa Howard was mostly just full of… well, just being Grandpa Howard!

        Another of his cold weather sayings was that it was “colder than a well-digger’s ass in Montana!” In all my lifetime, I’ve never met a well-digger from Montana who could verify just how cold their buttocks do get during Montana winters.

        And it seemed like he also had some experiences with the temperature of certain parts on a witch…

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  5. Well, not to be a damper, but you must have cold to have the beautiful trees the rest of the year…..can do it with the change of the seasons….which I think you both seem to weather nicely..No pun intended…well maybe a little!
    Sam & I are so proud we had a small hand in your life.

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    1. It sure looks beautiful and how did those flowers survive? We have a little cold but I was hoping for some snow to make it seem like Christmas. I think it is great you can go out and cut down your very own tree for the holidays. Are you staying home or traveling? Hope whatever you do it will be enjoyable. Happy Holidays.

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      1. Sharon, you’ll appreciate this: they were cut flowers that Chris stabbed into the snow on top of the compost pile. As for the holidays, we’re looking forward to visiting our families, who live in warm climes this time of year! Hope it snows for you. There’s still time …

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    2. Yes, Pegi, gotta have the cold and the snow. And the trees are so pretty with their winter coats! I bet I learned some valuable lessons at the Crane’s Nest Cafe to help me weather the weather. 😉

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